A Leisurely Afternoon

Mommy managed to sneak up on me earlier today while I was snoozing on the sofa, all by myself.  This is also the very same spot that without anyone watching me like a hawk, I lick my paws wet heehee.  The usual outcome is of course getting scoldings from Mommy, after which my paws would be blown dry with the hairdryer.

I just don't understand what the fuss is all about?  The paws are mine; why can't I lick them as I please???!!  Not to even mention that I also cannot scratch as I like.  OMG! Humans tsk tsk tsk *eyes rolling upwards* ... ...  Where are the dogs' rights? I want to complain to the 'gahment' (aka government)!